Can You Install Love?

Customer Service Rep: Can you install LOVE?

Customer: I can do that. I'm not very technical, but I think I am ready to install now. What do I do first?

CS Rep: The first step is to open your HEART. Have you located your HEART ma'am?

Customer: Yes I have, but there are several programs running right now. Is it okay to install while they are running?

CS Rep: What programs are running ma'am?

Customer: Let me see.... I have PASTHURT.EXE, LOWESTEEM.EXE, GRUDGE.EXE, and RESENTMENT.COM running right now.

CS Rep: No problem. LOVE will automatically erase PASTHURT.EXE from your current operating system. It may remain in your permanent memory, but it will no longer disrupt other programs. LOVE will eventually overwrite LOWESTEEM.EXE with a module of its own called HIGHESTEEM.EXE. However, you have to completely turn off GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM. Those programs prevent LOVE from being properly installed. Can you turn those off ma'am?

Customer: I don't know how to turn them off. Can you tell me how?

CS Rep: My pleasure. Go to your Start menu and invoke FORGIVENESS.EXE. Do this as many times as necessary until GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM have been completely erased.

Customer: Okay, I'm done. LOVE has started installing itself automatically. Is that normal?

CS Rep: Yes it is. You should receive a message that says it will reinstall for the life of your HEART. Do you see that message?

Customer: Yes I do. Is it completely installed?

CS Rep: Yes, but remember that you have only the base program. You need to begin connecting to other HEARTS in order to get the upgrades.

Customer: Oops...I have an error message already. What should I do?

CS Rep: What does the message say?

Customer: It says "ERROR 412 - PROGRAM NOT RUN ON INTERNAL COMPONENTS." What does that mean?

CS Rep: Don't worry ma'am, that's a common problem. It means that the LOVE program is set up to run on external HEARTS but has not yet been run on your HEART. It is one of those complicated programming things, but in non-technical terms it means you have to "LOVE" your own machine before it can "LOVE" others.

Customer: So what should I do?

CS Rep: Can you find the directory called SELFACCEPTANCE"?

Customer: Yes, I have it.

CS Rep: Excellent, you are getting good at this.

Customer: Thank you.

CS Rep: You're welcome. Click on the following files and then copy them to the "MY HEART" directory: FORGIVESELF.DOC, SELFESTEEM.TXT, REALIZEWORTH.TXT and GOODNESS.DOC. The system will overwrite any conflicting files and begin patching any faulty programming. Also, you need to delete SELFCRITIC.EXE from all directories, and then empty your recycle bin afterwards to make sure it is completely gone and never comes back.

Customer: Got it. Hey! My HEART is filling up with really neat files. SMILE.MPG is playing on my monitor right now and it shows that WARMTH.COM, PEACE.EXE, and CONTENTMENT.COM are copying themselves all over my HEART!

CS Rep: Then LOVE is installed and running. You should be able to handle it from here. One more thing before I go...

Customer: Yes?

CS Rep: LOVE is freeware. Be sure to give it and its various modules to everybody you meet. They will in turn share it with other people and they will return some really neat modules back to you.

Customer: I will. Thank you for your help.

The Missing Rib

A girl in love asked her boyfriend...

Girl (g): Tell me... who do you love most in this world?

Boy (b): You, of course!

(g): In your heart, what am I to you?

(b): The boy thought for a moment and looked intently in her eyes
and said, "You are my rib. In the Bible, it was said that God saw
that Adam was lonely, during his sleep; God took one of Adam's
rib and created Eve. Every man has been searching for his missing
rib, only when you find the woman of your life; you'll no longer
feel the lingering ache in your heart."

After their wedding, the couple had a sweet and happy life for a while.
However, the youthful couple began to drift apart due to the busy schedule
of life and the never-ending worries of daily problems....their life became
mundane....

All the challenges posed by the harsh realities of life began to gnaw away
their dreams and love for each other... The couple began to have more
quarrels and each quarrel became more heated...

One day, after the quarrel, the girl ran out of the house.... At the
opposite side of the road, she shouted, "You don't love me!"

The boy hated her childishness and out of impulse, retorted, "Maybe, it was
a mistake for us to be together! You were never my missing rib!"

Suddenly, she turned quiet and stood there for a long while.... He regretted
what he said but words spoken are like thrown away water, you can never take
it back. With tears, she went home to pack her things and was determined in
breaking-up.

Before she left the house, "If I'm really not your missing rib, please let
me go..... She continued, "It is less painful this way... let us go on our
separate ways and search for our own partners..."

Five years went by....

He never remarried but he had tried to find out about her life
indirectly...... She had left the country and back.... She had married a
foreigner and divorced..... He felt anguished that she never waited for him.

In the dark and lonely night, he lit his cigarette and felt the lingering
ache in his heart. He couldn't bring himself to admit that he was missing
her..

One day, they finally met.... At the airport, a place where there were many
reunions and good-byes.... He was going away on a business trip. She was
standing there alone, with just the security door separating them. She
smiled at him gently.

(b): How are you?

(g): I'm fine. How about you... Have you found your missing rib?

(b): No.

(g): I'll be flying to New York in the next flight.

(b): I'll be back in 2 weeks time. Give me a call when you are
back...You know my number... Nothing has changed.

With a smile, she turned around and waved good-bye..

Good-bye.....

One week later, he heard of her death. She had perished in New York. In the
event that shocked the world..

Midnight..... Once again, he lit his cigarette..... And like before, he felt
the lingering ache in his heart.... He finally knew, she was the missing rib
that he had carelessly broken....

Sometimes, people say things out of moments of fury..... Most often than
not, the outcome could be disastrous and detrimental....

We vent our frustrations 99% at our loved ones.... And even though we know
that we ought to "think twice and act wisely", it's often easier said than
done.

Things happen each day, many of which are beyond our control....

Let us treasure every moment and everyone in our lives....
Tomorrow may never come; give and accept what you have today.

The Whisper

Recently, I heard a touching story which illustrates the power that words have to change a life -- a power that lies right in the hands of those reading this article. Mary had grown up knowing that she was different from the other kids, and she hated it. She was born with a cleft palate and had to bear the jokes and stares of cruel children who teased her non-stop about her misshaped lip, crooked nose, and garbled speech. With all the teasing, Mary grew up hating the fact that she was "different". She was convinced that no one, outside her family, could ever love her ... until she entered Mrs. Leonard's class.

Mrs. Leonard had a warm smile, a round face, and shiny brown hair. While everyone in her class liked her, Mary came to love Mrs. Leonard. In the 1950's, it was common for teachers to give their children an annual hearing test. However, in Mary's case, in addition to her cleft palate, she was barely able to hear out of one ear. Determined not to let the other children have another "difference" to point out, she would cheat on the test each year. The "whisper test" was given by having a child walk to the classroom door, turn sideways, close one ear with a finger, and then repeat something which the teacher whispered. Mary turned her bad ear towards her teacher and pretended to cover her good ear. She knew that teachers would often say things like, "The sky is blue," or "What color are your shoes?" But not on that day. Surely, God put seven words in Mrs. Leonard's mouth that changed Mary's life forever. When the "Whisper test" came, Mary heard the words: "I wish you were my little girl."

Dads, I wish there was some way that I could communicate to you the incredible blessing which affirming words impart to children. I wish, too, that you could sit in my office, when I coun- sel, and hear the terrible damage that individuals received from not hearing affirming words--particularly affirming words from a father. While words from a godly teacher can melt a heart, words from a father can powerfully set the course of a life.

If affirming words were something rarely spoken in your home growing up, let me give you some tips on words and phrases that can brighten your own child's eyes and life.These words are easy to say to any child who comes into your life. I'm proud of you, Way to go, Bingo ... you did it, Magnificent, I knew you could do it, What a good helper, You're very special to me, I trust you, What a treasure, Hurray for you, Beautiful work, You're a real trooper, Well done, That's so creative, You make my day, You're a joy, Give me a big hug, You're such a good listener, You figured it out, I love you, You're so responsible, You remem- bered, You're the best, You sure tried hard, I've got to hand it to you, I couldn't be prouder of you, You light up my day, I'm praying for you, You're wonderful, I'm behind you, You're so kind to your (brother/sister), You're God's special gift, I'm here for you.

Weakness Or Strength

Sometimes your biggest weakness can become your biggest strength. Take, for example, the story of one 10-year-old boy who decided to study judo despite the fact that he had lost his left arm in a devastating car accident.

The boy began lessons with an old Japanese judo master. The boy was doing well, so he couldn't understand why, after three months of training, the master had taught him only one move.

"Sensei," the boy finally said, "shouldn't I be learning more moves?"

"This is the only move you know, but this is the only move you'll ever need to know," the sensei replied.

Not quite understanding, but believing in his teacher, the boy kept training.

Several months later, the sensei took the boy to his first tournament. Surprising himself, the boy easily won his first two matches. The third match proved to be more difficult, but after some time, his opponent became impatient and charged; the boy deftly used his one move to win the match. Still amazed by his success, the boy was now in the finals.

This time, his opponent was bigger, stronger, and more experienced. For a while, the boy appeared to be overmatched. Concerned that the boy might get hurt, the referee called a time-out. He was about to stop the match when the sensei intervened.

"No," the sensei insisted, "Let him continue."

Soon after the match resumed, his opponent made a critical mistake: he dropped his guard. Instantly, the boy used his move to pin him. The boy had won the match and the tournament. He was the champion.

On the way home, the boy and sensei reviewed every move in each and every match. Then the boy summoned the courage to ask what was really on his mind.

"Sensei, how did I win the tournament with only one move?"

"You won for two reasons," the sensei answered. "First, you've almost mastered one of the most difficult throws in all of judo. Second, the only known defense for that move is for your opponent to grab your left arm."

The boy's biggest weakness had become his biggest strength.

My Paintbrush

I keep my paint brush with me
Wherever I may go,
In case I need to cover up
So the real me doesn't show.
I'm so afraid to show you me,
Afraid of what you'll do - that
You might laugh or say mean things.
I'm afraid I might lose you.

I'd like to remove all my paint coats
To show you the real, true me,
But I want you to try and understand,
I need you to accept what you see.
So if you'll be patient and close your eyes,
I'll strip off all my coats real slow.
Please understand how much it hurts
To let the real me show.

Now my coats are all stripped off.
I feel naked, bare and cold,
And if you still love me with all that you see,
You are my friend, pure as gold.
I need to save my paint brush, though,
And hold it in my hand,
I want to keep it handy
In case someone doesn't understand.
So please protect me, my dear friend
And thanks for loving me true,
But please let me keep my paint brush with me
Until I love me, too.

By Davd, Wizard of Oz

Unconditional Love Is The Answer

There was a time in my life I became afraid to love. Because all those times I fell in love, I got hurt. I thought maybe that's why it's called "falling" in love.

I would give my all, loving deeply and wholeheartedly. It would be a truly emotional, extremely euphoric experience. I would dream about the object of my affection all day and all night, imagining good times together, thinking of what I can do or give him to show how much I cared. I would feel light as a feather, energized and excited, literally blooming with the joy I felt inside. Then somehow something would go wrong and my whole world would crash. Disappointment. Resentment. Anger. Pain.

Why? Can we not love without pain? Is disappointment really a price to pay for all the happiness we feel when we're in love? Should we blindly accept that because we love we get hurt?

It was only after many years of soul-searching and internalizing inspirational writings that I discovered that I can love without getting hurt. I finally understood that unconditional love was the answer.

Love is one of the most powerful forces in the universe. It is the fire that burns inside, the essence of being. Love is the source of all our comfort and contentment. It is a precious gift that defines our purpose in life. If we keep in mind that we can indeed preserve its true meaning, we can love to the fullest and be happy the rest of our lives.

Accept that people express love in different ways.

How do YOU express your love? You say "I love you" three times a day, you kiss and embrace him every chance you get, you never forget your anniversaries, and you always prepare his favorite dishes. How does HE express his love? He rarely says "I love you", he seldom kisses you, he forgets your birthday, and he doesn't even try to cook. But he works overtime, walks the dog, helps you with the laundry, takes you to the movies, and calls you "Honey". He probably loves you as much as you love him, he just shows it differently. If you can accept that difference then you can have a healthier perspective of your relationship.

Derive happiness from giving love.

When you love, do it because you want to. There is indescribable joy in loving. Just give it. And cherish the satisfaction in having given someone something of yourself. It's like giving a gift. Whether it is appreciated or not, find joy in simply giving.

Love without expecting anything in return.

Now this is where pain comes in: when you demand something in return for the love you give. You are actually setting yourself up for disappointment because love cannot always be reciprocal. Love between two people can never be of the same intensity at the same time and place. No matter how much your partner loves you, she will never be able to fill all your needs all the time. And you are worst off if you believe you should love only when you are sure to receive equal love in return. Sad to say, you will be waiting in misery forever.

Love now.

The past is gone and the future is just a dream. All of yesterday's aches and pains, even the joys and laughter, are mere memories. Let them go. And your fantasies and worries? They may never come. So why dwell on them? Live now. Give love now. Do it now and enjoy the moment. That is the secret of inner contentment.

Throw away those destructive habits.

When you insist upon yourself that you always have to be in control, that you always have to be right, that others must always please you, you mold unreasonable expectations of yourself and the ones you love. Loving relationships are flexible, dynamic, and evolving. Give room for change and interaction. Allow for new behavior and learning experiences. When we welcome these into our lives, we open ourselves up to love and affection rather than anger and frustration.

Yes, you will say that unconditional love is easier said than done. Especially when we have always believed that love is give and take. Try believing that love is simply giving. They say "Give until it hurts". Let's say "Love until it hurts no more".

The Most Beautiful Heart

One day a young man was standing in the middle of the town proclaiming that he had the most beautiful heart in the whole valley.

A large crowd gathered and they all admired his heart for it was perfect. There was not a mark or a flaw in it. Yes, they all agreed it truly was the most beautiful heart they had ever seen. The young man was very proud and boasted more loudly about his beautiful heart.

Suddenly, an old man appeared at the front of the crowd and said, "Why your heart is not nearly as beautiful as mine." The crowd and the young man looked at the old man's heart. It was beating strongly, but full of scars, it had places where pieces had been removed and other pieces put in, but they didn't fit quite right and there were several jagged edges. In fact, in some places there were deep gouges where whole pieces were missing.

The people stared ­ "How can he say his heart is more beautiful?" they thought.

The young man looked at the old man's heart and saw its state and laughed. "You must be joking," he said. "Compare your heart with mine, mine is perfect and yours is a mess of scars and tears."

"Yes," said the old man, "Yours is perfect looking but I would never trade with you. You see, every scar represents a person to whom have given my love - I tear out a piece of my heart and give it to them, and often they give me a piece of their heart which fits into the empty place in my heart, but because the pieces aren't exact, I have some rough edges, which I cherish, because they remind me of the love we shared."

"Sometimes I have given pieces of my heart away, and the other person hasn't returned a piece of his heart to me. These are the empty gouges - giving love is taking a chance. Although these gouges are painful, they stay open, reminding me of the love I have for these people too, and I hope someday they may return and fill the space I have waiting. So now do you see what true beauty is?"

The young man stood silently with tears running down his cheeks.

He walked up to the old man, reached into his perfect young and beautiful heart, and ripped a piece out. He offered it to the old man with trembling hands. The old man took his offering, placed it in his heart and then took a piece from his old scarred heart and placed it in the wound in the young man's heart. It fit, but not perfectly, as there were some jagged edges.

The young man looked at his heart, not perfect anymore but more beautiful than ever, since love from the old man's heart flowed into his.

They embraced and walked away side by side.